When my wife and I were engaged, we were challenged to come up with our expectations for marriage. We had no idea what married life would be like, but we were excited to experience it together. We established what expectations had and then formed some goals together to achieve the expectations we thought would be attainable and helpful. We did not go into this new stage of life with pessimism or such low expectations that we anticipated the worst. We carried excitement, optimism, and hope into our new life together, and this served us well as we navigated this new season together!
Anytime you face a life transition, it is very important to establish goals and articulate what expectations you have. Are you carrying primarily fear, pessimism, or discouragement about your college experience? As a Christian, you can trust that the Lord’s plans for you are plans “to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future” (Jeremiah 29:11). This does not mean that you won’t experience any stress, difficulty, or disappointments in college. However, it does mean that you can and should approach this new season of life with hope! Expect good things from your college experience, and even if (or when!) trials come, you can approach them with a more well-rounded perspective.
Below are four expectations I hope you carry into your college experience.
1. Lasting Memories – In some ways, college is made for these kinds of lasting memories. Most likely there will never again be a time where you are surrounded by so many people your own age in one place. You will have much more free time than you have or maybe ever will have, and countless opportunities will be before you. Your college years have the potential to be some of the best years of your life. Take advantage of the opportunities presented to you, and don’t wish away these years to get to “better things.” There are great memories to be had!
2. Deep Relationships – College presents a lot of social opportunities with clubs, dorm life, college ministries, campus and sporting events, etc. Balancing school work and friends can be difficult, but they do not need to be mutually exclusive. College is a key time to build new and deep relationships. An important question to ask yourself is what will your relationships be based on? A shared love for Christ and desire to live life for Him are important starting points for some of our closest friendships. You can also build relationships on a shared passion for a social cause or career field, and these friendships will grow in college as you learn through your academic and social experiences.
3. Clear Vision – Everyone has dreams and hopes in life, but not many actually ever have a clear vision of the path in front of them. A clear vision includes developing wisdom, gaining insight, and understanding what God has called them to. Having clarity in your future pursuits will help you feel more confident and purposeful in your life as you graduate and move into the “real world.” Seeking clarity does not mean certainty that your life’s direction won’t change, but it is a confidence that you are stepping forward in obedience to God as He leads you step-by-step.
4. Fruitful Faith – Notice, I didn’t simply say a “strong faith” or just a “relationship with Jesus.” If you are a follower of Christ, I hope you do have a growing, strong relationship with Jesus, but as a college expectation, I hope that your faith in Christ will be fruitful – meaning, that it produces. Think of an Apple Tree. What if it never produced any apples? This is a symbol for someone who understands the meaning of what Jesus teaches in Matthew 5 about being the Light of the World and the Salt of the Earth. Will you be ready when God gives you the chance to change lives?
Even though I listed these in this order – Lasting Memories, Deep Relationships, Clear Vision, & Fruitful Faith – the truth is they are in opposite order of priority. A fruitful faith is the foundation. If you place any other of the three as a foundation, it will be shaky ground. A clear vision is your direction, led by your fruitful faith. The deep relationships are the substance of your time in college, and the lasting memories are the result of the other three.